Sex in the city

So in response to my friends challenge about there not being enough sex in my writings, I shall devote a whole post to it!

Vienna is liberal in many ways.  Its recently had its pride parade and so rainbow flags are still flying in the city.  The green man at traffic crossings is always two figures, not one like the UK, and dotted around the city are 2 women holding hands with their hearts lit up, and 2 men holding hands with their hearts lit up, as well as a man and a woman.  Every time I look up and see the couples telling me to cross, or not, it makes me smile that this even exists in a city 70 years ago would of had you in a concentration camp for being in love with someone of the same sex.  Its great.

But I didn’t realise just how liberal it was until I moved here.  If you go for a stroll along the Danube there are naked bathing areas, which I have no issue with.  But you just go along and bam its in your face, no real warning, no alternate paths, just boom willies everywhere.  My understanding is that these become a dogging area late at night (note to self – stay welllll away!).  But I assume that’s not too different to the UK?

What did surprise me was the main shopping street, the Oxford Street of Vienna, which has a big sex shop on it.  Again not that unusual, there is an Ann Summers on Oxford Street after all.  What Ann Summers in Oxford Street doesn’t have is a sex cinema at the back of it.  Now I was slightly taken aback that a sex cinema was so easily accessible, I thought these were consigned to sleazy backstreets of the 1980’s.  But no, here one was for anyone to wander into whilst doing their weekly shop.  Ok, so that’s a little odd but fine.  However I then learnt that as prostitution is legal in Austria, the cinema has, shall we say, some extra services above and beyond popcorn?  My sources tell me you can watch a porn film and get a blow job all at the same time, and once you’re done you can continue down the street to choose your summer clothes, or buying presents.

I was actually quite shocked by this, and anyone who knows me is fully aware I’m not the shy type.   But life carried on and my other half and I then went for a walk.  Whilst out and about I needed to pee, luckily there was a random portaloo tucked up just off the path we were on.  So I dashed up into it.  It was hideous- like end of a festival in sweltering heat hideous, but I was desperate.  As I sat down, I notice a hole had been cut into the side of the portaloo.  It was about waist height.  As looked at it for a moment wondering why on earth this hole was in the side of the wall it hit me.  Its a glory hole (for those of you who do not know what this is, I will not ruin your innocence, and I do not suggest you look it up at work).  So I figured that this loo wasn’t just there for my convenience, but also for the local men.  I was once again shocked, and disgusted.  I wasn’t disgusted at the thought of a glory hole, grown adults can do what they like, but this was a highly unpleasant cubicle, and whichever person was on the inside could only be doing it for the money, and I sincerely hope whoever it is, is being paid handsomely because for me to stay in there any longer than it took to pee- there isn’t enough cash.

So, for someone who has prided herself on being an open minded liberal for many years, I’ve been shocked at just how easy it is to cum in seemingly innocent Vienna.

Ps.  Sorry Mum!


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